Book of Pages

Books are the bricks that build my cell
Pages the chains that bind me
No partner, no love, nor friends to quell
This solitude that rages around me
A barren confession, to shameful to tell
A hollow life, unlived, left behind me
A life sentence served and a lifetime to dwell
On this loneliness that will always surround me.

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Pandora’s Legacy

When Pandora’s box was opened and all the ills of the world where let loose the gods conspired to leave one thing remaining to aid humankind. What remained in the box was Hope.
What happens when this, too, is lost?
The spirit dies, there is no point. No point in trying. No point to anything you do.
Just [...]

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Tired

Each day I feel tiredness increasing, disappointment refuse from ceasing. Choose an option, make a decision, for it to end in wrong choice made. Tired of the fight, tired of the struggle, the rip off, bargain basement, buy-one-get-one free world. Want to close my eyes and never once open them again.

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Dead Man’s Shoes

I looked down
and saw
that I was wearing
Dead Man’s shoes.
How odd
that I recognise them
as my own.

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Wherever I am

Wherever I am I know I am alone…lonely. I can see the universe as one that either side of my skin, my mind, are one and the same. Yet, I shall always feel lonely.

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Balancing on the wire.

If I slip and fall back into the past where only creatures knawing on empty dispair set traps for me, in halls of mirrors reflecting each and every failure, rejection and pointless path experienced in this wasted world, then the famished, ravanous writhing beast twists in my gut, overwhelms and devours me.
This present moment, a [...]

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A word on Tricking Paths

The three posts below were written some time ago (1987!) Boy, I was young then. I found them recently while clearing out stuff, realise how much I have forgotten, or never learned in the first place. In the Wasteland section of my blog because I find the fact I knew stuff and then forgot it [...]

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tricking paths I

Just a feeling of not having
Not having happiness, not having contentment
Of not belonging….to anything or anyone
Of not being a part of…and of being excluded
A feeling of being lonely in a crowd
And not being part of that crowd
Of being on the outside looking in
A spectator not a participant
A reporter of life and not living
Just pushing back [...]

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tricking paths II

It comes unexpected and uninvited
One moment normal social interaction
Then a dream sequence in a blurred slow motion film
The voices muffled, distant
Everyone in a bubble and I am on the outside
I can hear and see you, but I am not there.
I see through the eyes of the whole world
I hear the world, feel it, hear the [...]

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tricking paths III

Maybe I’ve spent too many lifetimes trying to imitate hollow idols and maybe I am doing it now, by definition, the imitations must be hollow also. Maybe I’ve worn the mask for so long that I can now no longer see or know what lies behind it. The spectres of things I never did or [...]

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